Feminism has ruined modern day dating, marriages and relationships in general, how many of you nodded in agreement? I have heard this statement countless times which made it extremely hard for me to ignore. Upon personal observation, I discovered that such statements are frequently uttered by or supported by individuals who favor conventional cultural and religious norms that dictate/define womanhood (i.e. how women should act in romantic relationships and outside, look, or dress).
All of which happen to be the complete opposite of what feminism advocates for. For instance, traditional norms assert that women belong in the kitchen and at home, and should only speak when spoken to while feminism says women have a voice (they should use it) and should be wherever they choose to be.
So, when I hear that feminism ruined dating, all I hear is that feminism as a movement is working towards dethroning the male species as a superior sex, making it difficult for men to pursue partnerships in which everyone is considered equal in intellect, wealth, access to opportunities, and other factors.
One of the most prevalent defensive statements I've heard is that feminism has contributed to individualism which in turn ruins relationships. Well, thanks to feminism, women are more focused on their own needs, aspirations, and goals, and no longer feel the need to make sacrifices that previous generations made as part of their obligation as wives, (future wives) mothers, or sisters. Individualism was never an issue when women were expected to or forced to give up their lives, careers, sacrifice their dreams for the men in their lives.
Women quit jobs, relocated, remained in toxic relationships and had children even going against their own wishes and personal choices.
Feminism has given women the power, freedom, and a voice to question some of these cultural and religious traditions that were primarily enforced to benefit males while burdening women. Feminism prompted women to challenge themselves, society, and everything else.
I believe that if they (men) knew more about feminism they would no longer fear it, for they would find in feminist movement the hope of their own release from the bondage of patriarchy- Bell Hooks
Now, when you argue that feminism ruined dating, what you are saying is that dating was easier when women didn't have any rights over their own bodies, couldn't inherit or own property, couldn't go to school, and couldn't speak out.
Gender equality (political, social and economic) as one of the core principles of feminism, should not be considered a threat in modern day dating. Research in fact proves that gender equality is beneficial to both men and women. Further research indicates that men who intentionally abandon cultural norms and beliefs in romance have more meaningful and committed relationships.
Here are some books which you can read to further your knowledge on feminism:
Feminism Is for Everybody by Bell Hooks
We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Adichie Ngozi
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