Crowned And Crucified; The Internet’s Love-Hate Affair

One day, they’re praising you. The next, they’re dragging you. That’s the internet for women, especially women who were given a spotlight.

I read something similar to this about a month ago on Instagram and now it is making total sense after my findings. Just look at Ayra Starr. Her hit “Rush” went platinum in the UK and it was Grammy-nominated. She was celebrating her win, her moment and then a random man online decided to comment that she “looked like she smelled.” That’s the internet most of the time: celebrate your wins and someone somewhere will try to humiliate you. Sometimes what may seem like a simple comment might destroy someone’s motivation.

Tems too. For a while, her body in spite of her music talent was everyone’s obsession. Her curves, confidence and presence. And now? She's being body-shamed for just being “too big” without “enough behind.” The same body that was praised is now under fire, which is confusing.

Locally, we have also seen our Malawian women being dragged online for just being themselves and doing what they want with their lives or bodies. For instance, the likes of Priscilla Kayira for “not having kids yet”, Hazel Mak for “moving on too fast” and Keturah who recently shared her gym pictures and people in the comments said her new body doesn't really match the type of music she makes.

But this isn’t just about famous women and/or artists. Everyday women face the same digital cruelty. Post a selfie, share an achievement or speak out and the comment section becomes a battlefield. You’re either too loud or too quiet. Too sexy or not sexy enough. Too successful, too confident, too much.

The internet crowns women when they fit a fantasy, but it crucifies them when they stop performing. When they gain weight. When they celebrate. When they simply exist. It’s truly exhausting and violent. This mostly discourages women from putting out what they have achieved after struggles which results in less role models for the young women and upcoming artists.

We need to talk about how the online world mirrors real-life misogyny — but with louder echoes and no consequences. Because whether you’re Tems on a world stage or a girl from Blantyre posting on her WhatsApp status, no woman should have to shrink to survive.

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